Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
