After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Its about making memories worth repressing
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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