And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
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