we're blogging at a bar
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Randomize
