Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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