We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
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The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
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Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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