That's intense
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
