Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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