they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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