Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
i think my cat just said my name.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
