I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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