I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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