I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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