me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
