But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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