Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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