thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
