Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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