she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
