you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
