No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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