I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I want a musical about memes.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
