He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize