I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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