I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize