im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
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