this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
