i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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