how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
