Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
