Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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