i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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