yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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