i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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