Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
