Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
we should paint friendship bongs
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
