I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize