I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
