New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Are my feet made of real feet?
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
