I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
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