More tranny stories later!
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
