The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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