idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
