Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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