like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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