I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it