I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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