Just mADE A PArabola og urine
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
