apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
