you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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