oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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